Thinking of Me
by gibbygirl
Summary: I polished this a bit, had it up here a while ago and just redid it. It is between the end of OoT and MM and Zelda has a proposition for Link and he has a reaction she doesn't like. It's a oneshot.


I face Link and try to read his emotions. His eyes, that penetrating blue, are revealing nothing, although I know that he must be curious as to why I summoned him here. His face has always been like a statue, and I have always had the feeling that he is hiding his true self from me. I don't believe I have ever seen him smile. I hope that my offer will bring a smile to his face, break through the stone and show me the man beneath.

I will be overjoyed when this is all over and my beloved Hyrule has a king once more. I am not cut out to rule alone, and what's more, I would not wish to. Link knows Hyrule better than anyone, who better to rule it? His knowledge of the lands and people will be such an asset to the court. I can envision a new Hyrule, a land that is happy, unified, and prosperous. It will no longer be a plagued and war-torn place, but a lush and green and beautiful kingdom.

But above all, in my heart of hearts, I know the real reason I am asking him is because I have come to love him. No one else has ever captured my heart, and I know that no one else ever will. He risked his life for me and for my kingdom simply because I asked him to. When I see him, my heart stirs. His very footsteps bring butterflies to my stomach. I cannot wait to hear him utter the words of love that I have so longed for, cannot wait for our first kiss, and so much more.

I smile at him as I fidget with my robes, thinking of our future together and say, "Link, since Father died, the pressure has been on me to find a husband for myself, and a king for Hyrule." I wait to see if this has any effect. When I see none I continue, "I have had, as I'm sure you can imagine, many offers already. But I have decided, Link, that there could be no one better for the position, than you." I wait again for a reaction. He just stares, and I wonder if my offer has shocked him. "Link," I whisper, hoping to evoke some of the feelings that I have for him. "Link, it would be such an honor for me, and for Hyrule, if the Hero of Time would become king."

I am her hero. I know this much. I am not grateful to her for giving me the opportunity to fulfill my destiny. I would have been content to stay at home and remain forever the-boy-without-a-fairy. But I suppose destiny cannot be fought, and I would not wish my terrible task on another. My name will never be forgotten, or at least, what I have done will never be forgotten – yet I do not feel happy. I do not feel much of anything anymore. I have become almost mechanical, a thing created to kill.

I cannot do what she asks of me. I have ridden into battle half-dead from exhaustion, I have slain monster after monster, I have braved extreme conditions and suffered intense injuries and done it all for her and her kingdom. But I will not do this. I cannot love her. I wonder if I have the capacity to love after all that I have so thoughtlessly destroyed. And even if I do, my love would mean nothing to her.

I am not the man she thinks I am. To her, I am the Hero of Time. I am the boy who stepped out of the shadows and offered some hope. I am the one who put her plans into action, who helped her realize her dreams. I am the man who saved her from the clutches of evil. I am sure her girlish heart has romanticized what and who I am to some extent. She sees love where there is none. She is not the woman of my dreams; rather, she is the woman of my nightmares.

How could I forget all that time on that quest why I was there? How could I forget who had put me in such a position; me, a young boy with no experience, little training, and no time spent in the outside world? I was plunged into a world of evil so quickly and almost without a thought. She plagued my dreams at night, taunting me, pleading with me, and begging me to carry on. I look at her and I see a curse.

It is not her fault. I know this. But even this knowledge cannot sway me. If I agreed it would only hurt her, more than my denial ever will. She would spend the rest of her days with a cold-hearted, unfeeling man who could not return her feelings. She will come to realize this in time, and if she doesn't, at least I will know that I made the right decision. But I cannot tell her all of this. How could I reveal to her the true reasons for my refusal to become her king, her husband, her lover? I will not break her heart in such a violent manner. She was, after all, one of my few companions through it all, and despite myself, I have a soft spot for her.

And so I look up at her, my face betraying nothing. I have perfected this stony gaze, hiding the haunted man inside. "Zelda," I say, "my lady, I cannot do what you ask. I have unfinished business. There is someone I must find, a dear friend who saved my life more than once. I never had the opportunity to properly thank her. It is my wish to leave Hyrule and search for her. You are a strong woman, Zelda, you can handle the responsibilities, I'm sure. I _am_ sorry."

Her face has fallen, and I can tell that I've hurt her. But I cannot dwell on that. I turn to walk away, and I do not look back when she calls my name and chokes back a sob. I suppose this means I have turned my back on the queen, and therefore, turned my back on Hyrule. But I have done all that I can do here. I have fulfilled my destiny. Will they try and take more? Will they deny me my freedom even longer, trap me here and expect me to do their bidding for the rest of my days with a smile on my face? They can't. I won't allow it. For the first time in a long time I am going to think of me, and only of me.


End file.
